• Navigating Infertility

    The Truth About Trying to Conceive: Dear Infertility, You Suck

    Dear Infertility… You suck. You are a silent enemy, creeping in when I least expect and choosing to stay. I never expected you. I assumed that getting pregnant would be so easy. I never knew how hard trying to conceive was. You showed me how naïve I was. I thought I could ignore you and keep myself busy. But you continue to show up and make your presence known. In all the questions from well-wishers who ask, “How many kids do you have?” or “When will you start having kids?” I see my husband goofing around with my nieces and nephews; I see him holding my playing, laughing with our friends’ kids. Like daggers to my heart, reminding me what I do not have. And then there are those who jokingly say, “Are you sure you want kids? Are you really sure that you are ready for all of this?” They say it innocently. They do not know you, Infertility, like I do. But, oh, my heart. It feels like I am being stabbed. They do not know that I had been thinking about having children leading up to the decision to start trying to conceive. That was over two…