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Anxious Attachment: Practical Advice on How to Overcome Nighttime Conflict
I can vividly remember one of the most common pieces of advice my husband and I received during premarital counseling: never go to bed angry. This advice, often linked to Ephesians 4:26-27: “In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold’—initially caused a lot of tension and anxiety in the early years of our marriage, especially when conflicts arose just before bedtime. So, what does this verse really mean, and how can you avoid the pitfalls I experienced, particularly with an anxious attachment style? Let’s dive into the answer in this post. During the early years of our marriage, my husband and I were firm believers that we should never go to bed angry. This principle was easy to maintain during the honeymoon phase of our marriage. However, as time passed, our first argument lasted into the night. One argument turned into two, then three, and so on, and we found ourselves stuck in a cycle of late-night arguments. I felt the need to resolve the argument before going to bed, thinking that “good Christians” shouldn’t go to bed angry. I always thought…
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Just for the Summer: Unraveling Love and Attachment
If you’re on the lookout for a fictional book that dives deep into mental health and explores the complexities of attachment in relationships, Abby Jimenez’s “Just for the Summer” is the perfect pick for you. This post reviews “Just for the Summer” and offers insights into how the author masterfully intertwines the theme of attachment theory within the romantic and familial relationships of her characters. If you are curious about attachment theory, I have a whole blog post on the overview of it that you can check out here! Summary of “Just for the Summer” Abby Jimenez’s “Just for the Summer” is a contemporary romance that immerses readers in the captivating world of romantic “curses.” Justin, an engineer, accidentally becomes an internet sensation after sharing on Reddit about his peculiar curse: every woman he dates mysteriously finds their soulmate immediately after parting ways with him. Similarly, Emma, a traveling nurse, faces the same perplexing phenomenon in her romantic endeavors. When Emma reaches out to Justin after stumbling upon his post, they devise a daring plan—to date each other and then break up in hopes of canceling out their curses and finally discovering true love. Emma’s impulsive decision to take a…
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Building Secure Attachments: A Journey of Love and Connection
Hey there, mama! I’m so glad you found your way here because I’m incredibly passionate about the topic we’re diving into today. I’m a new mama navigating the beautiful chaos of parenthood, armed with a background in mental health and counseling. My recent journey into motherhood was through adoption, a path that filled my heart with immeasurable joy and purpose. One cornerstone of my parenting philosophy is nurturing a secure attachment style with my son. Today, I’m excited to dive into attachment theory, explore its significance, and share practical ways to foster secure attachments with our little ones. What is Attachment Theory? Exploring the Four Attachment Styles Attachment theory, developed by John Bowlby and expanded upon by Mary Ainsworth, provides insight into the bonds formed between caregivers and children during early development. These attachment bonds shape our perceptions of ourselves and others, influencing our behavioral patterns and interpersonal relationships throughout life. There are four primary attachment styles: secure, anxious-ambivalent, anxious-avoidant, and disorganized. Let’s examine each one in depth: Secure Attachments: Formation: Secure attachment typically develops when caregivers consistently respond to a child’s needs with sensitivity, warmth, and reliability. This fosters a sense of trust and security in the child, who learns…
